How do they know?

Kids are sponges! Vibes, germs, swear words… if you’re giving them out they’ll absorb them and use it against you.

A friend recently started a new job; Very exciting for mama but a bit daunting.. you know, normal first day jitters, and of course her kiddos played up at daycare drop off.

She messaged our group saying “ugh how do they know!?” and I was like: babe, I don’t know how they know BUT THEY KNOW.

It’s true: you can get up each day, put your big girl undies on and use your mum voice all you like, but if you have one ounce of self doubt? Your kids will exploit you for that like you’ve just shoplifted a lip gloss and you don’t want the ‘rents to find out.

So how do you get confidence as a Mum?  Well that’s a hard one… but here are a few things that helped me in the end.

Baby number I. Don’t be fooled by that smile.. I was in the depths of self doubt at this stage
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Springing into those same old stages

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Spring has sprung and with it came a new baby! Well lots of babies, probably, but mine in particular.

My son came into the world early and he’s big, cries lots, feeds like a demon all day long and our hearts are so full. But it turns out that I still know nothing about nothing *anguished sob* Continue reading

Round II

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Welp, here’s something personal… I’m knocked up with baby number II.

My main reason for sharing is to tell you that OH MY LAWD round two is proving to be a lot harder than round one! My energy is low, my nausea is high, my stomach was popping before i even hit the second trimester, and my back and left hip is aching like it did the day before I last gave birth!

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How to travel with a baby

M and I

Looking back at our piece of paradise

Looking back at our piece of paradise

Hubby and M

Hubby and M

Private beach, and private outdoor shower

Private beach, and private outdoor shower

 

When a dear friend of mine announced she was getting married in Rarotonga we immediately agreed to go – baby in tow – and this is the story of how we survived the 3-4 hour flight there and back again.

Before I start, I just have to say that travelling anywhere by flight with a child is stressful. It’s stressful for your child, stressful for your fellow passengers, stressful for you as a parent, stressful for the flight crew, BUT, if you have the chance to travel I think you should take it.
Travel isn’t a given. It isn’t something that everyone is lucky to experience, and I reminded myself of this often when things got a little tough. Continue reading

Sleep… Glorious sleep

Sleep is my god.

 

I worship it, I reach out for it and I feel confused and lost when, despite praying to the sleep gods, I can’t achieve it. Now I try to live by all the sleep “rules” in the hope that it’ll be my time. That I’ll go to sleep heaven.

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Babies and the age gap

 Here’s another question for the masses… If you’re wanting to have more than one kiddo, and if in an ideal world you could plan their age gaps, what would you go for?

This is something I’ve been thinking about A LOT. I keep flipping from thinking I’m ready for another to thinking “hell no, I can’t do this again. Ever. Ever. Ever”.  Continue reading

Things I’d like my kids to know…

Inspiration

Everyone wants to impart some wisdom on their kids so they can learn those important life lessons the easy way. Reality is that they probably won’t listen and they’ll have to learn it all the old fashioned way… By trial and error; winning, failing, living.

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10 things to know about me…

There’s a person behind this blog, and in an effort to share a little more I’m gonna jack those magazine columns that ask people for unknown facts about themselves… Continue reading

Fixations

The things you fixate on can be really dumb sometimes…

My darling girl just turned one so I’m weaning myself off pumping.  When I went back to work she got really sick with an ear infection and then refused the boob. It was hard because I wasn’t ready but also because I had this predetermined idea that I’d breastfeed until she was a year old. I don’t really know where I got it from or why I decided it was a particular goal, but it is what it is.

I think it might be an accomplishment thing… Like, I don’t even want to lie that I feel quite proud that she got the liquid gold for as long as I could provide it.

Anyway, all this got me thinking about the things you fixate on!
They could be big, and usually the big things are the important things, or small silly things like:

– If your baby suddenly changes their poop schedule

– If they don’t drink their allocated 200ml bottle because the formula tin says they should

– If they don’t eat as much solid food as the Plunket chart says they should

– If your baby doesn’t sleep as much as that stupid book/magazine article/blog said they shoud

– If your baby gets nappy rash and that zinc cream everyone swears by doesn’t work right away

I suppose what I’m trying to say is that we can obsess about the little things to the point that we lose sight of the important things.
Like how my baby was happy (reflux episodes exempt), loved, cared for, warm, fed, and cuddled at all times. I know it’s really hard to get your head out of the day-to-day in order to think about the big picture but once I started to do it, I found it really helped my overall experience as a new mother.

So to my fellow māmā’s, try to focus on the little things that bring joy rather than the ones that can drive you crazy.  Like that new baby smell, their first smile, their head resting on your shoulder, that little sigh of relief they do when you pick them up out of their cot when they’re crying. You’re doing an amazing job by worrying about those fixations, but they do no service to yourself if that is the only thing you focus on.

 

What were your fixations?